Pardon me...

"and 100 more" (nth256) 02/21/2018 at 21:28 • Filed to: Parenting fail

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14

... while I burst into flames? No, while I pull my foot out of my mouth.

Talked about spontaneous human combustion with my 9yo, then he went upstairs and cried in the shower because it freaked him out. The imagery of “ya know what a half-burnt match looks like?” was probably the culprit.

Sorry Dad, you’re fired.

cbell04 > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 21:40

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My wife when teaching the kids about the fire place “IT WILL MELT YOUR FACE OFF” I just looked over like damn that’s a bit harsh. Now they practically cross the street when it’s on.

OPPOsaurus WRX > cbell04 02/21/2018 at 21:45

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we’ve been trying to explain to our kids why it would be bad to get hit by a car. I dont think they believed me when i stepped on a bug and said thats pretty much it right there.

Die-Trying > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 21:46

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did you tell him to stay away from lit cigarettes, and matches, and not to try lighting his farts anymore?.....

wafflesnfalafel > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 21:50

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scar’d for life...

and 100 more > Die-Trying 02/21/2018 at 21:56

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At first i gave the neutrino hypothesis, which was apropos to conversation we were having, but when he got out of the shower I told him that it mostly had only happened to smokers... “Ohhhhh!” “And you’re not gonna be a smoker, right?” (Son nods head.) He bought that theory, thankfully.

and 100 more > cbell04 02/21/2018 at 21:58

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So will a good metal band, but that’s the good kind of face-melting.

and 100 more > OPPOsaurus WRX 02/21/2018 at 21:59

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Disney-friendly, I like it!

and 100 more > wafflesnfalafel 02/21/2018 at 22:08

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Better than charred for life.

Frenchlicker > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 22:15

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I think around that age is when I discovered it and was fascinated by it for a week or so and read about it in the library. I guess some just have way different interest.

Die-Trying > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 22:17

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yeah, i tried to find that famous picture with the cigarette still in the ashtray, but i couldnt......

but thats good parenting though, “ if you gonna cry, go do it in the shower, i dont want you to make a puddle on the floor”.... good stuff. until he asks mom......

youre doing a fine job......

wafflesnfalafel > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 22:22

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absolutely - everybody f@#$’s up their kids. If this is the worst you do, you are a saint.

RallyDarkstrike - Fan of 2-cyl FIATs, Eastern Bloc & Kei cars > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 22:23

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Good song choice! I’ve got it amidst my collection!

Chariotoflove > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 22:32

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At least you still seem to have some credibility with yours. Mine won’t believe anything I say until she cross-references it with Mom first.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > and 100 more 02/21/2018 at 23:15

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Meh... what doesn’t kill him will make him stronger...